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How Not to Move in 4 Ridiculous Steps

One thing I’ve learned during the lifelong analysis I’ve done of my own life is that I have learned how not to do a lot of things.  I’ve made many mistakes, I’ve seen others make many mistakes, and I have tried to learn from them.  One thing I have not learned from, however, is moving.  I have moved so many times in the past four years that one would think I would have it down by now.  I moved from my parent’s old house to a trailer while we were finishing our new house during my senior year of high school.  Following my graduation, we moved from the trailer to the new house.  Three months later, I moved to college for the first time.  I then moved home for January and back up for spring semester and back down for summer.  I repeated that process for two more years and now I am back during my junior year packing to go home for my last summer before my senior year.  I should have it down, right?


I have come up with four steps for how not to move so maybe you can take something from this.  If I’m going to be a chronic mover, I’d at least like someone to put the knowledge I’ve learned to good use since I obviously am not going to!

1) Go garage saling the weekends leading up to the big move.

Nothing makes moving that much harder than boxing up even more stuff than you thought you had.  You won’t have enough boxes for everything and you will lose your mind.  As enjoyable as garage saling is, it sure can cause some nightmares when done at the same time you are trying to move.  If you are really trying to make your life harder than it already is, then go garage saling right before a big move.DSC_0506

2) Don’t separate your things according to type.

Isn’t it more fun to discover all the different types of things you have by throwing whatever you can fit into every box?  Who needs to label boxes “Picture frames” or “Toiletries” when you could mix a few picture frames and a few toiletries and why not add some bed linens and remote controls in there too.  Just make sure the tubs you use are transparent and you’ll be well on your way to driving yourself insane.DSC_0499

3) Procrastinate on your last minute projects so that you have no time to pack.

Make sure you write your ten page papers at the last minute or finish that big work deadline the same day you are supposed to move in order to create chaos and thus excitement.  Sit around and do absolutely nothing the week before you move and then cram everything into boxes the day before.  That way your move will be a disaster and so will whatever you were working on the day before.DSC_0502

4) Run out of food and starve so that you don’t have to move food to your new place.

Nothing makes moving more exciting in addition to having extra stuff, throwing everything into random boxes, and procrastinating than starving!  If you are cheap like me, you can ‘diet’ before the move by leaving only two boxes of pasta, some cereal, and expired milk for eating for two weeks.  Also, make sure you pack your kitchen up so you can’t even cook the pasta and are left with the expired milk and cereal.  You’ll be glad you did because at least you’ll look good while you’re moving – if you have the energy to lift anything.

Obviously all of these are ridiculous as the title indicates, but basically if you do the opposite of this you’ll be in good shape.  For much better moving guides, check out the following links.

Good luck moving in the future!  I know I need all the help I can get.  Do you have any stories about moving disasters – I’d love to laugh at someone else instead of myself for a change!

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6 comments to How Not to Move in 4 Ridiculous Steps

  • Valerie

    As a person who has moved many times in her life it really is always a huge challenge. Even when I think I am being very organized in the end it comes to chaos. Probably because mentally it seems easier than it really is physically. I hate moving and the more you live the more stuff you accumulate making it even harder to move your stuff.
    My best advice is to not procrastinate packing and to have a good attitude!

  • Valerie

    PS Get a lot of friends to help with the actual moving. The more the better!!

  • Oh boy, I’ve been there. I’ve moved more times than I would like to remember. My secret weapon are those large blue Ikea bags. I always get a few extras of those for all the random stuff that is hard to box up or can’t be packed until the last minute. I also go through a huge de-cluttering spree before moving and get rid of a lot of things that I decide I don’t need (and don’t want to move).

  • moving sucks… i’m a procrastinator when it comes to packing too.

  • Grace

    Oh man, those sure are recipes for disaster when it comes to moving. I hope your move goes a lot smoother than that. The only moving disaster I have had is that I almost lost my wedding and engagement rings. I have terrible exzema and the year before we moved it was really bad so I had taken my rings off and put them in a little plastic container in the freezer. When I got to the new house I had forgotten to move the things from the fridge freezer. My friend convinced me that it was worth going and getting the odds and ends from the freezer and it was only when i actually looked in the freezer that I remembered about my rings. Yikes.

  • Hahaha, oh man, I hate moving. It sucks. Like you, I’ve moved more times than I’d ever care to. In fact, this year (our 1 year Houseaversary) is the first time in the past 5 years that I’ve stayed in one place longer than 8 months. For the past 5 years, I had moved twice (sometimes 4 times) every single year. The only good thing (I think) that comes out of moving is that you are forced to go through some of your stuff and get rid of things that you really don’t need. All-in-all, moving sucks and I’m so happy to be able to stay in one place for awhile. You’ll get there, too! Good luck with your move.

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